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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27621107">Damie // One Shots</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CryingInBly/pseuds/CryingInBly'>CryingInBly</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV), The Haunting of Hill House (TV 2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cute, F/F, Falling In Love, Female Characters, Female Friendship, Female Protagonist, Gay, Hopeful Ending, Inspired by The Haunting of Hill House, Lesbian Character, Love, One Shot, POV Female Character, Short One Shot, Shorts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:15:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,506</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27621107</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CryingInBly/pseuds/CryingInBly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of one shot stories, based mainly in time frame of Dani and Jamie living together after leaving Bly manon.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dani Clayton &amp; Viola Lloyd, Dani Clayton/Jamie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. hope is a dangerous thing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The year was 1989, a cold snowy day in Vermont, Dani, who had grown up in the states was partial to a bit of snow. It brought back dear memories from her childhood, before things became so difficult, before Jamie, before Bly and before Eddie. The simple times that sometimes she wishes she could go back to and start over. Although without her hectic past, she would not be the woman she is today, brave enough to live with the woman she loves and express her true feelings with someone so caring. Jamie however, had never seen snow before this winter, or at least not that she could remember. Today Jamie spent her working day in the flower shop, gazing out the windows at the cold flakes falling from the sky, constantly thinking about the first time it snowed.</p><p>She and Dani were walking around town on a Saturday evening; the states were nothing like England. Everything was so much more vibrant here. Dani had her usual purple sweater, brown skirt look, accessorised with brown coat and boots, while Jamie herself, dresses mainly in black. Black jeans, black boots and black coat, with a pop of green on her checked shirt. They walked together to a local coffee shop that they went too every Saturday once the flower shop had closed for the afternoon. A treat for them, while Dani still hadn’t mastered tea or coffee, and Jamie’s cooking was still rather questionable, tea and sandwich at the local coffee shop was always a safe option.</p><p>This particular evening, the pair sat on table outside. It was extremely cold, but they sat close and watched the world go by letting the tea warm them from the inside. Something had landed on Jamie’s arm, she went to brush it off but it was just water. She looked over to Dani and said “I think it’s starting rain Dan”. Dani of which was sitting there smiling, much to Jamie’s confusion she didn’t move. “C’mon we’re going to get wet” Jamie exclaimed and stood up. “Sit down Jamie, look”. She looked away from Dani and out across the street, there were multiple tiny white flakes falling from the sky. Jamie turned back to Dani and sat down eyes in awe. They stayed there a while and the snow had started to settle before they decided to go home. It wasn’t too far but it was beginning to get dark. So they went home and on this night the left the curtains open a little later than usual so Jamie could watch the snow fall so peacefully. A beautiful moment in nature. So now every time it snows they both have their happy memories.</p><p>Jamie was waiting for Dani to come back, she’d been tutoring the neighbours little girl 3 days a week. The girl was sick and unable to go to school but her parents still wanted her to be learning, Dani had settled in fast and enjoyed teaching her. Although sometimes it worried Jamie. Dani would come home some evenings with a troubled look on her face, but it wouldn’t be until the pair got into bed at night that she would about her worries. Jamie would softly brush the hair off of Dani’s face and ask her what was wrong. At first she would say nothing, but Jamie knew that there was always something to be said and after a few moments of silence Dani would always reveal her troubles usually starting off with “well there is just this one thing...” the root of her problems always taking her back to moments a Bly. The girl reminded her of Flora, who she missed dearly, but that was just the start.</p><p>Dani had always felt safe with Jamie, from the first time they had spoken, she knew just how big a heart Jamie has underneath all the sarcasm and tough woman act. Jamie herself needed someone in the same way that Dani did and being reminded of Bly, it wasn’t Viola that worried Dani the most. It was the thought that one day Jamie would be without her, and she would be without Jamie.</p><p>Dani had told Jamie her main worries of leaving her, she gets upset almost every time, but Jamie is always there to reassure her that she will be there with her all the way till the end, whenever the end may come, but it’s when Dani is sleeping that things being in weigh in on Jamie too, she knows in herself that what they have won’t last forever and all those days when Dani is out while she’s working she worries what if today is the day that Dani doesn’t return. It is always on her mind that one day will be their last day together. Although what frightens her the most is the not knowing when that day is coming. She hopes for a life time with her lover, but knows that neither off the will ever really know until the day has been and gone.</p><p>So for all the days passed and all the future days, where Jamie stays in the flower shop watching out the window for snow, while Dani goes out and returns again, Jamie always reminds her how much she loves her, and in times when she is sad, she’ll remind her “chin up Poppins” and smile.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Stop</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Just a short one because I got a block half way through oops.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Dani stop,,,,,, Dani, stop the car,,,, the brakes,,,, DANI”  Jamie screamed. She hadn’t anticipated that teaching Dani to drive would be so difficult. This was the 4<sup>th</sup> time they had been out on a lesson and almost died. The 5<sup>th</sup> if you count the time at the traffic lights, although that one wasn’t Dani’s fault. She just could seem to grasp the concept. Jamie was the one who suggested that Dani learned to drive. She was reluctant at first; Dani didn’t like the idea of having a stranger yell at her while she was trying to concentrate. So they came to a compromise that Jamie would teach her the driving basics and then she would get a proper instructor. <br/><br/></p><p>They pulled over onto the side of a quiet street, “Dani breathe” her hands were visibly shaking at the wheel, Jamie dropped her frown to a look of sorrow, she felt bad for yelling, and for her lack of patients. She put her own hand on top of Dani’s, who at this point had a single tear rolling down her cheek the Jamie wiped away with her other hand and guided her with a deep breath. “There we are, I’ll drive home, it’s not far from here”. They got out the car and switched seats. The drive home was silent, much like all the other times they had ended their driving lesson badly.</p><p> </p><p>Dani just was never fond of the idea, most of the time she’d ask Jamie if they could walk to the places they were going. It seems that Eddie’s death had more of an effect on her than she had first thought. Her biggest fear now was losing Jamie the same way, busy traffic and car horns often made her uneasy, although you wouldn’t be able to tell from looking at her.</p><p> </p><p>Once at home Jamie went to the kitchen to water their plants while Dani went for a shower. She hadn’t seemed herself since the car ride, and Jamie’s guilty feelings grew stronger. She decided to go and see Dani in the bedroom, although she wasn’t in there. Jamie knocked on the bathroom door before entering. Dani was sitting sobbing in the shower. ”Hey, shh shh shh” Jamie turned off the shower and sat down next to Dani, pulled her in close, she was freezing. Jamie reached for the towel on the floor and wrapped it around Dani and whispered “I’m sorry”. After a few moments she pulled Dani up off of the floor and in to the bedroom. The pair changed in to pyjamas before laying on the bed for a cuddle. Jamie hadn’t seen Dani like this for a while now and it always broke her heart when she did.</p><p> </p><p>“Jamie” Dani who was lying on her chest looked up at Jamie; “I don’t think I want to drive, well I do, but I don’t think I can” she looked back down. Jamie seeing couldn’t bare seeing Dani like this again, “baby you don’t have too”, she stroked her hair until she was feeling at ease.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Boring Old Pub</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dani had been working in Bly for three months now but shed only made her way up to the town once and that was with Owen when he was bringing groceries back to the manor. This particular day the children had been overly testing on her patience. Miles had cut Jamie’s plants again, Jamie didn’t know about this yet, it was her day off and she was running errands in town. Flora thought it would be a great idea to teach her dolls to swim. So when Dani came to check on her, the bathroom between miles and floras bedroom was flooding, Flora had left the bath running while she collected her dolls and while rushing to turn off the tap, Dani slipped and bashed her knee on the side of the</p><p>After an outfit change and some dinner she put them both to bed early, and sat in kitchen for a while almost falling asleep into her own hands but she was awoken by the familiar voice of Jamie. “Aye Poppins, you look exhausted” she kissed Dani on the forehead before sitting down next to her.</p><p> “Oh Jamie” she sighed and looked blankly into her eyes with an attempted smile. “Wait what are you doing here”, “well, I thought hmm I know this really pretty blonde American called Poppins, who has been working extra hard recently and thought she might fancy some boring in the boring old pub that I still haven’t introduced her too, what do you say Poppins”  her smile grew, this time was real. “I’ve asked Hannah and Owen to watch the children already” she winked.</p><p>They climbed into Jamie’s car, and although she had her denim jacket on Dani was shivering, tiredness was moving through her body. But with Jamie she felt something that she never felt around anyone else, she felt safe and that for once she didn’t have to be looking after someone else. “You cold Poppins, here” Jamie reached to the back seat for her coat and put it over Dani’s legs. The drive was 20 minutes or so long, but it felt much long to Dani who was very unfamiliar with the town.</p><p>They pulled up to the little old pub, ‘The Purple Lion’, and above it was Jamie’s little flat. “Alright George” Jamie said to an older man behind the counter as they entered, “you want your usual, little lady, oh and a friend, two usual’s” he winked, she nodded. The sat at a small booth in the corner and the man known as George brought over two pints of beer. As soon as Dani picked up her glass Jamie started laughing at the way she held it. They both drank quite fast. The pub was sweet, Dani was people watching the customers, everyone seemed happy, and in that moment she felt as though she didn’t belong, she wasn’t happy in herself and she knew that Jamie could tell. It was the way she looked at her, almost a look of sorrow but more a look of concern. Dani was in such a daze that when Jamie reached over to hold her hand it startled her and she gasped. Jamie squeezed her hand, “c’mon Poppins, let’s go upstairs”.</p><p>The left the pub and walked around the back to Jamie’s front door, it was green, no surprise there. Jamie’s flat was smaller than Dani had expected but the décor was classic Jamie, there were plants in every room, it was colourful unlike the dullness at Bly. “Sit down and I’ll make you a tea, with some sugar” Dani put her coat on the rack and went into the living room.</p><p>Jamie brought in two cups of tea and took a seat next to Dani on her read cushion sofa, “you don’t seem yourself Poppins, how was your day”?</p><p>“Well if I’m honest Jamie, it was a little challenging; I’m just tired I guess, the children were just being children, I think they’re bored of me” Dani sighed.</p><p>“Now don’t talk like that, they adore you, can I ask, it’s just I noticed you’re walking funny”</p><p>“Oh yeah that, flora flooded the bathroom and I slipped but I’m sure it’s nothing, it hurts thought” </p><p>“Can I look, you might need some ice” Dani lifted her leg onto Jamie’s lap for her to roll up her pant leg but it wouldn’t roll. She stood up, unbuttoned her jeans and took them off, nothing Jamie hadn’t seen before; she sat back down and re-elevated her leg which was visibly bruised. “Tell me if it hurts when I do this” Jamie placed her hands underneath her leg, her hands were warm. She pressed her thumbs into the side of her kneecap. Dani winced in pain, it travelled through her body. Jamie released quickly, she stood up and got an ice pack from the freezer and wrapped it in a towel, “This is going to be cold I’m sorry”. She was right it was cold but after a while it numbed the pain.</p><p>Jamie could see Dani was finding it hard to even keep her eyes open, she reached for a button up off of the air dryer and handed it to Dani, “Sleep here tonight, I’ll take you back in the morning”. Dani changed into Jamie’s shirt, while Jamie changed in the bedroom. Although Dani hobbled in half way through. She climbed into Jamie’s bed, it was soft and her whole flat smelt fresh. Jamie turned off the lights and cuddled up next to Dani; she ran her fingers through her hair and soothed her until she was asleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. The leafling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It was the spring of 1997, Dani and Jamie had been staying in England in Jamie‘s old flat, she’d kept it for this reason, so if they ever found themselves back in Bly they would always have a place to stay. They had spent the last few days going up to the Manor as Jamie wanted to check on the garden that she hadn’t seen for a good few months now the last time they visited was at Christmas and everything was overgrown and undernourished. But Jamie found happiness in reviving these plants. It kept her sane. Dani, over the years working at The Leafling has also learnt a trick or two from Jamie about plants. She understood the love for them and appreciated the time they took to fully bloom. Jamie would stare from a distance, watching Dani as she watered The flowers and deweeded the property. Dani would often catch herself looking to Jamie for some kind of approval, but would find Jamie already beaming over at her indicating she was doing things right. Bly this time of year was at its best, it always was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dani spent a lot of time in the greenhouse, while Jamie spent her time on the grounds, she’d worked at Bly for years and knew what needed doing to prepare for summer and autumn. She was out mowing the grass by the lake, it was over grown and filled with moss from winter, but she powered through. It was usually a whole day's job anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’d almost finished de-weeding the lawn when she heard a crash and a scream from the greenhouse. She dropped her shovel and ran over to the greenhouse. Dani stood surrounded by a smashed plant pot and blood dripping from her hand. “Jamie, I-I’m sorry” she stuttered, wobbling on her feet. Not a lot of things phased Dani, spiders, bugs, any type of rodents she was okay with but blood was something she struggled to handle. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey shh shh shh it’s okay, sit down, I’m sure I have first aid box here, I was always injuring myself on rose thorns and nettles, just sit down” Jamie held at Dani’s arms and lead her over to the wicker chair, Dani was trembling and unsteady and whilst sitting took some deep breaths. Jamie reached under the small glass table in the center for the first aid box. It was covered in dust and dirt on the outside but inside everything was brand new. She took Dani’s hand while kneeling at her feet, “you need to unclench your fist so I can look, just look away”. Jamie wiped the blood off of Dani’s hand with saline wipes, she could see in the palm of her hand where the pot hand cut her, “Dani this is going to hurt” she pressed her thumb over the cut to feel for any small pieces that may be stuck in there, she felt Dani’s arm tense up, but luckily she could not feel any thing in the cut. She cleaned it once more and put a dressing over it to protect it from any of the dirt in the greenhouse. “I think we should go, I’m starving” Jamie looked at her watch to see that it was 4 pm and they hadn’t had any lunch yet, they headed out of the greenhouse and Jamie locked the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The drive was short into Bly town, well at least with Jamie’s driving it was short, they’d pulled up at a little restaurant to grab something to eat. It was surprisingly quiet inside, they were seated straight away at a small table just round the corner from the bar, Dani still found it difficult every time they came back to Bly, well England really to find something on the menu that she actually liked eating, usually she just let Jamie order for her. So they both had jacket potato with tuna and cheese and some bread from a small basket. A waitress came over with the bill, although neither of them were really paying much attention until she spoke. Jamie took a double take at her, familiarising herself with the woman whom she hadn’t seen or heard from in over 25 years. She decided not to spark the conversation with the waitress that her own daughter was sitting right there in front of her and all of a sudden Jamie could feel a deep feeling of misery. It weighed down on her chest and all the things she’d spent years trying to forget came flooding back to her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They paid the bill and left, without saying a word to the waitress other than “thank you”. Dani could tell that something wasn’t quite right with Jamie, because when Jamie was upset Jamie would do what Jamie does, complete emotional shut down. She wouldn’t even hold hands with her on the way back to the car. It was like she had entered a black hole with no proper way out and even though Dani was right there she didn’t know how to explain what she was feeling. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They spent most of their evening in silence back in Jamie’s flat. Dani had made tea, and over years and years of practice her tea was drinkable now. Jamie cuddled into her on the sofa, laying on her lap while they were watching tv. Dani sighed and looked down at her wife running her fingers through Jamie’s hair, trying not to pull on the curls but after a few moments she could feel a wet patch on her leg. Silently Jamie was crying, “Jamie, what’s wrong baby”, Jamie sat up to face her, and Dani brushed her tears away, and held her face and whispered, “Cmon now Jamie look at you, what’s wrong, you can’t just tell me it’s nothing when you’re this upset”. They touched foreheads and sat in silence for a few moments more before Jamie broke away, she sat round with her elbows on her knees, head in hands with Dani softly rubbing her back. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You see Dani, it’s been a while, well years since I’ve seen any of my family and well I guess I thought I’d never see them again. I was okay with that, I had accepted that, they’re not great people, but today, at the restaurant, it was her voice that caught me first, but accents are common. Then I looked up at her and I knew. The waitress, that’s my mum Dani, Louise Taylor, and seeing her again made me remember things, horrible things that I just never wanted to think about again” </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“D-do you think she knew it was you”? Dani stumbled on her words.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nah, and even if she did, she wouldn’t own up to it, she never took responsibility for anything, well that i could remember, I was only young when she left but the name, Taylor, has cursed me for years.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Would you want to go back, to ya-know, speak to her?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No Dani, I had thought about it but I feel it would cause more harm than good”</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well if you ever decide that you want to speak to her, I will come with you”</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know popping, do you fancy a little boring right now?” Jamie looked at Dani with sad eyes but smiled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What kind of boring?” Dani smiled back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Get your coat, we’re going for a drive”</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She did as she was told. Got her coat, and Jamie’s coat, because as much as she likes to think that she won’t freeze to death in spring, at night it’s a different story. Dani hadn’t forgotten what life was like in England. It was quite late, Dani was struggling to stay awake in the car, she used Jamie’s coat as a blanket like she always did and somehow they found themselves back at an empty Bly manor. In a strange way Bly was a safe place for Jamie. The only place where all she’d ever have to worry about was her plants.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They walked up to the greenhouse where Dani had spent most of her afternoon, the broken plant pot was still scattered across the floor, Dani looked at it and then looked over to Jamie who rolled her eyes and laughed. “What are we doing here Jamie?” she asked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jamie had been rummaging around in a small cupboard for about 5 minutes, she knew what she was looking for, she just wasn’t very tidy when it came to keeping her cupboards in order. “Right” she stood up “I’ve got it, let go” she walked past Dani who was watching her movements, confused but intrigued she followed and eventually she’d worked out what they were doing. “So Dani, have you ever wanted to plant a moonflower.” Jamie looked at her and smiled. This was her secret place for years, a place they now shared, and through all the years they had been together every year on their anniversary Jamie would give Dani a moonflower. The leafling and bloom for another year together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They planted the seeds together at the bottom of the gate it would grow and wind around. A small but simple gesture of love with connection to healing, maybe Jamie was processing the events of the day. They took a step back and sat on the logs that had always been there, and looked over at the empty space where the moonflower once was, and where soon it would be again. Dani held Jamie’s hand close to her heart while a single tear rolled down her cheek, not sad tears, but happy ones. “Jamie” she sniffed and they looked into eachothers eyes, Jamie wiped the tear away and smiled, and through the exhale of a deep breath Dani began to speak. “You have changed my life in every way, you saved me and you carry on saving me every day. This is our tenth year together and every day I learn more about you. I love you more and more, you’ve never given up on me, even when times have been rough. Through all the stumbles and all the falls you were always the one to pick me back up and I just want you to know that I see your struggles too. I watch you on your worst days still trying to be light in mine, and you are, you always are and you always will be. No matter how hard the struggle I am never leaving you” she took Jamie’s hand that she was still holding and kissed it. They were both tearful, but Jamie pulled her in for a real kiss. Dani’s lips were always so soft, and the smell of her hair always bought comfort to Jamie. “I love you” Jamie whispered. </span>
</p><p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Ghost of Christmas Past</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Merry Christmas Bly stans&lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>As Jamie sat in the lake knowing Dani wouldn’t drag her down, she thought about all the possibilities she had to join her, wishing she could just switch places. Maybe her mind was stronger and she could live with it for longer. Living with a monster would be far easier than learning to live without Dani and the life they had created together away from bly. Jamie claimed out of the water and ran over to their secret spot where the moonflower would grow, there was one last but on the verge of bloom. The last flower of the year. She picked it with care, and took it back to the lake where she placed it carefully into the water to float, almost like a final goodbye to her wife. Looking into the water's reflection hoping she would see Dani, but she could only see herself, a tear fell from her cheek and hit the water, a tiny droplet of her mixing with the large volume surrounding Dani, and although she was gone, Jamie hoped Dani would feel it. Not much of Dani had remained in weeks leading up to this, she’d become a shell, a forever home for the dark spirits of bly, but jamie knew even if it was only the tiniest fragmented memory, Dani was still in there somewhere. </span>
</p><p>
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  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>As the years went by, Jamie spent her days trying to hold on to her. She looked for her in every reflection. Not a day went by where she didn’t think about Dani. Waking up every day to an empty bed, an empty apartment filled with the fragmented memories of what once was, of who they once were, but slowly she was forgetting, every day forgetting. She’d forgotten her smell, the way it lingered wherever she had been. Jamie was forgetting the sound of Dani’s voice, the sweet soft sounds that are forever fading further and further into the past. She was forgetting the way Dani laughed, and the way she would look at her with those incredibly sad eyes sometimes. She had forgotten her touch, the way Dani would play with her hair and hold her hand, but everyday she kept forgetting when all she longed for was to remember. Everyday Dani was alive she spent them avoiding her reflection and avoiding the truth and now Jamie spends her days alone in their apartment hoping for the return of the au pair. </span>
</p><p>
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</p><p>
  <span>Dani’s closet had been untouched, the whole 10 years she had been gone nothing was moved out of place, apart from her pink blouse that was left on the chair in the bedroom the night before. Jamie often wore this when she was feeling extra lonely. When the days waking up alone felt almost impossible, and the nights she spent in tears hoping her wife would just come home. She always left a light on at night, the door a jar, just in case, but nothing ever came of it. She’d fill up a bath with water and sit there staring for hours hoping to see Dani’s reflection instead of her own.</span>
</p><p>
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</p><p>
  <span>Sometimes, she’d catch a glimpse, in the most out of the ordinary places. One time Jamie was shopping at a Christmas market, standing at a stall with beautifully designed Christmas wreaths, she had purchased one and was waiting for it to be wrapped and packed. So she stood there and had a look around at some of the other stalls around her,she looked up from the counter just slightly the first time, but quickly looked back as it seemed to her that someone dressed just like Dani, had been stood the at her first glance, but in full view there was nobody there. A trick of the eye and mind she thought, until it happened again Jamie was behind the counter at the leafling, it was almost closing time and she was counting the daily takings, when she was disrupted by the sound of the bell ringing above the door when someone enters. She looked up but there was nobody there, she ran to the door, pulled it open and poked her head outside looking up and down the street. It was quiet, no one really around. She thought this to be strange so she closed the door and locked up for the night, and for the months that followed instances like these kept happening, it was like a spirit living in her shadow always there but just out of sight, just out of reach. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The following Christmas came around, another whole year Jamie had spent alone looking out for a sign that Dani was there with her, but nothing was ever conclusive. The leafling would close on December twenty third until the twenty eighth, it always had done. In the evening of the 24th Jamie would always open any Christmas cards she had been sent. She never received many, a few returning customers would send one to the shop with sweet messages but the ones she looked forward to the most were the ones Owen would send her each year. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dearest Jamie,</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Another crazy year gone, </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I hope you’re doing well and not overworking yourself,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I hope to come and visit you soon, I miss you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Have the merriest Christmas and I will write to you again in the new year,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lots of love</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Owen xx</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>She also had cards from Flora and Miles,</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>To Jamie darling, </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Merry Christmas </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Love from</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Miles x</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dear jamie, </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Thank you again for attending my wedding,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>To see you again soon would be perfectly splendid,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>There is a surprise in the smaller envelope,</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Merry Christmas </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lots of love </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Flora xx</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Jamie opened the small envelope with care and inside was a baby scan photo with a note on the back, </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Surprise!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re going to be an auntie to my little girl.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>X</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Jamie pinned up her cards, and put the baby scan photo on the fridge, next to a photo of her and Dani. Dani would have been so excited about Flora’s news, she always loved hearing from her when she was younger, when she remembered who they were and what Dani had once meant to her. The day had been quiet enough for Jamie so she decided on an early night. She climbed into bed leaving the hallway light on as she always did and drifted off to sleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>—————————————————————</span>
</p><p>
  <span> It was early on Christmas morning when Jamie woke, too early to get up for the day but she went to the bathroom to stare at her reflection just for one moment in hopes that it would be Dani’s reflection staring back at her, but as always it wasn’t, just her own. She looked over at the clock on the bathroom wall, it read 4:09am. She walked back into the bedroom with tired eyes and pulled back the cover to get back into bed. She jumped back, screamed and bashed into the window sliding down to the floor with her head on her knees. She panicked, this couldn’t be real, how could it be real she was right, except she was also still lying asleep in bed, exactly where she had been all night. While trying to catch a breath Jamie crept closer to her own body, watched as it breathed, the rise and the fall, she felt sick to her stomach. Every detail was correct even down to the curls in her hair, but how, she thought, what was happening to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>She went back into the bathroom and threw her head over the toilet seat, violently bringing up all the fear she was feeling, along with last night's dinner. She froze for what felt like an hour. Shaking with confusion curled up on the floor next to the toilet and for a moment of pure curiosity Jamie looked back up towards that bathroom clock. She stared, this cannot be right, it still read at 4:09am. Maybe that wasn’t the time at all, the battery had just died but it was still ticking. Over and over, tick, tick, tick, the noise drove her further into hysteria. She jumped up, tore through the flat into the kitchen, to the kitchen clock that sat just above the stove. Standing in front of it looking down with her eyes closed, Jamie slowly opened her eyes and raised her head. Shock set in, her hand trembled as she reached for the clock. The second clock, that also read at 4:09am. Her tears hit the clock's face and caused her blurred vision and that’s when she saw her. Standing over her shoulder, Jamie dropped the clock, it bounced and rolled across the floor. She wiped her eyes and turned her body. “Merry Christmas, Jamie”.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde figure stood, like she always had, without aging a day since the last day they’d been together, but something was different, she had a glow about her. Jamie stared into her eyes, the key to soul that she knew so well. Both eyes blue, it had been years since they had been that way. There wasn’t sadness in her eyes anymore unlike the final days they’d had all that time ago. “Not even a hello” the figure smiled and moved towards Jamie taking her hand. Jamie let out the breath she’d been holding, slowly looked down at their hands and scanned back up to her eyes. ‘Dani?’ She questioned, the moment she had so been longing for had finally arrived and she  was frozen. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>‘It really is me Jamie, I’m here, I’m always here, popping by to see you. Following you in the street, watching your movement, keeping an eye on the shop, keeping you safe. Short circuiting the toaster every time you leave the toast in for too long. I’m always here, you just never found, you never sunk deep enough. I watch you sleep, usually peacefully, most nights”. Dani never once let go of her hand and as she spoke Jamie’s grip grew tighter and tears streamed down her face. Dani stepped in closer, wiped the tears from Jamie’s cheeks and held her. Forehead to forehead, in the middle of the kitchen.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Dani” Jamie whispered, “I love you so terribly and I miss you so much, this is a moment I’ve wished for since that very first day i woke up without you, but I know right now, this isn’t you and this isn’t me, because I’m in there an-“</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey shh shh shh, listen to me” Dani whispered softly “you’re right, you’re always right, always with a logical explanation for everything, but for tonight, for right now, just live in this moment with me, yeah” Dani’s eyes begged and pleaded with Jamie’s, almost bargaining with her to stay. How could Dani be a ghost if Jamie could feel her, smell her, and soon after Dani kissed her, she pressed her lips onto Jamie’s like every time before and after a few seconds Dani pulled away. “It’s me, Jamie, please, just one more night together”. Jamie nodded, “one more night”.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They sat on the sofa in front of the Christmas tree, Jamie was tired from crying, and after planning this moment for years, what she would say to Dani if she ever got that chance too, her mind was blank. They just looked at each other and each minute that went by grew more painful to endure. It was an awkward silence, one of nightmares, but it was Jamie’s dream.  She never had a dream this vivid, not like this, with Dani here, clear as day. In the outfit she wore when they first met. So innocent. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dani looked around the almost untouched flat, she noticed the new wreath, “you always did like Christmas, well the plants involved with Christmas” they both laughed and for the first time tonight felt completely comfortable with each other. Jamie cuddled up to her, and Dani played with her now grey hair. “I love you Dani”, “I love you too Jamie”, the both looked at each other with soft eyes. Jamie heard a cough from the bedroom, and turned her head, down towards the hallway. “It sounds like you’re waking up” Dani said as Jamie turned back with sad eyes again. “But I don’t want to go, I just got you back, please don’t leave me again, come with me” Jamie pleaded. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know I can’t, but like I told you I’m always with you, my hand is always on your shoulder, you’ll see me again, trust me, just look a little harder, I’m always there, remember how much I love you, but you must go back now, wake up, enjoy your Christmas, stay safe, remind Owen how much I loved him, and as for Flora’s baby, tell her how proud I would’ve been when you next see her, but for now you must go” before Jamie had a chance to talk back Dani placed her index finger on the centre of Jamie’s forehead and sent her to sleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>—————————————————————</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Jamie woke up on Christmas morning in her bed, she sat up fast and looked down at the bed, it was empty, she was herself again. She walked to the bathroom, turned off the light, looked up at the clock, it read 8:42am, but just to be sure she waited a few moments and then walked through to the kitchen, the clock was back on the wall above the stove and it read 8:43am. Time was moving again, she was awake, for real this time and once again Dani was gone, into the darkness and the unknown. Although strangely Jamie did feel different after her dream. She felt safe again, a new type of security. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>She made her morning tea and sat down where she sat last night in her dream, it felt so real, Dani was there, in front of her, next to her and maybe she still was. A piece of paper drifted towards Jamie across the coffee table. She looked up, the window wasn’t open, but she wasn’t scared. She placed down her mug carefully and picked up the note and sobbed, like she did on that very first morning she’d woken up alone. It read,</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I miss you always </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Love</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Poppins. X</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
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